-sigh-

My car was totaled in an accident last Saturday night.



But this means 3 things:
1. I don't have a car.
2. I don't deliver newspapers anymore. (see above)
3. I can't afford to keep the booth in the flea market. This Sunday will be my last Sunday unless business picks up. But if I don't make the rent, I need to call it quits until I get some money.

-sigh-

It was a good, almost 3 month run...but no one has any money. God knows I don't. Hell I don't have money to get a car, even a crappy one. I don't even have enough money to pay next month's bills. Still job hunting. Still have the Jeep, except it's going through coolant like crazy and I don't have the money to fix it. And because it was going through $35 a day in gas and a bottle of coolant every night I had to deliver the paper, I had to leave the Bulletin because I couldn't afford the gas (I wasn't going to have enough money to make it to my next paycheck) and I can't afford to wreck my only car, nevermind repair it. I mean...I stopped delivering Tuesday night because between Sunday morning and Tuesday night it had gone through $140 in gas ALONE. $140.

I didn't go to the auction tonight either. Why tempt myself or resist temptation and go home empty-handed? Besides, don't have a car to get to J.C. I spent the night posting supplies and a few pieces of jewelry on Etsy and combed the basement for spare change...1993 style. I remember I did that on January 1, 1993, which kicked off coin collecting because I found a nickel from 1938 and had never seen a Jefferson nickel so old before...so...an obsession was born. But now I'm searching the house for old purses & wallets that I abandoned full of change when I was working at ITema because when I was working at ITema, money didn't really mean much. So far all I found in the basement were a bunch of wheat pennies and Big Y coins and tokens from the Connecticut Toll.

I need money. Right now. I mean, I almost contemplated going back to The Resident and working for Alexis EXCEPT I forgot the biggie--my camera is a tad broken. And she requires you to take your own pics for the story. Oy.....broken camera, broken car...

AT LEAST my credit card is not maxed out. But my bank account is empty. Most of the time I'm actually okay with it but right now I have PMS and don't feel like eating anything in the house.

Anyway.

I spent a lovely day walking around what's left of the antiques district in Putnam. This is what I observed.

1. I don't care, the SIMPSONS is not old enough to be considered antique, or even vintage.
2. Even though I haven't visited that huge 4 story antique store on the corner since 1994, that 1869 map of Sterling is STILL there. Whattttt. That's 14 years of sitting there collecting dust and probably the only person who might want it in this entire state is me. LOL
3. More than 50% of the antique stores that were there when Mom and I were going to the Dark Forest are now gone, and their storefronts remain empty.
4. That being said, is Putnam still considered to be one of the leading antiques districts?

I had Chai tea at Victoria Station, even though I really can't afford $3.30 lattes. I've been kind of spoiling myself this week because Wednesday was my birthday and naturally Thursday was Valentine's Day...but I couldn't celebrate my birthday Wednesday because I had the post office exam in Hartford...so I used the entire rest of the week to do it. I don't care that my car is wrecked, really. I didn't care Saturday and I don't care now, not when being alive is what's important. You can always buy a new car (well....not right now...lol) but you can't buy a new life, no matter how much Everclear says you can. lol